What makes you smile?
With pregnancy brings crazy hormones---I'm not telling you anything new. I am unaware of how transparent I am to others sometimes. Maybe you see what I'm about to say, or maybe you see the complete opposite and this is surprising to you? I don't know...after all, how can you see the way others perceive you?
I am naturally a thinker. My mind goes nonstop (shocking, right?). Most of the time, it's extremely serious and depressing "end of the world" type stuff. I have to consciously make a decision every day what thoughts I am going to allow myself to focus on, and what I am going to put my energy towards.
My husband has been driving me crazy. He has many amazing qualities, most of which any woman would kill to be able to enjoy. I, on the other hand, am in my crazy hormonal "you make everything suck" stage. I've been focusing on ALL of his negatives instead of ALL of his positives! Yesterday, I was just to the edge of feeling sorry for myself, my- perfect, hard working, money earning, house cleaning, makeup wearing, diaper changing, bill paying, "miss do it all by herself"- self. I was getting the short end of the stick in EVERYTHING and Eric was causing more harm than good. So, I decided to dig up a book to read. In my search, I found a book I had never read before that had been lying around for years. "the Love Dare". I took it out and immediately the first chapter hit me hard.
"...Impatient people are some of the hardest to live with." was a line that really sunk in. I have always known I am an impatient person. I've never looked at it as a horrible quality, but in this book, it explained how impatient spouses are quick to react. Quick to be angry and hurt and to say hurtful things. Here I was for the past month thinking I was the poor one who was treated unfairly and had done nothing wrong. I felt so guilty when I realized that person is me. I'M the one who's hard to live with. I'M the one quick to anger, and not so quick with forgiving. This first day's challenge was to say nothing negative to my partner, and WOW! We got along great even through today. I noticed a huge change when I changed MY attitude and MY perspective.
I'm thankful for this change of heart, and for the revelation this book has already brought me. I will continue to read it and hope that it helps me change into a better spouse, mother, and friend. In the meantime, I'm choosing to focus my crazy nonstop energy into positive outlets. If you struggle with anxiety or depression or negative thoughts, here are some things that I practice daily that put my mind and well-being in a better place:
1. coffee in the morning
2. exercise- yoga I find is the most calming and mind-centering
3. reading the bible (new development) just a couple chapters a day
4. lighting a candle
5. deep breathing
6. taking a long walk while listening to calming music that makes your heart happy
7. cooking an easy meal that I know the boys will like
8. cleaning! so therapeutic, and I find it allows you to think clearly
9. limited tv time. I find tv to be an extremely depressing thing if overused
10. being outside somewhere peaceful and pretty
11. driving to a different city and doing something unusual for yourself
12. playing a fun game. (I like chess)
Maybe try some of these things if you want! Oh, and if you're in the same boat as me, I already encourage the "Love Dare" book to you and your spouse. I guess your problems in life really have to do with yourself, and not so much with the world and others around you.
I am naturally a thinker. My mind goes nonstop (shocking, right?). Most of the time, it's extremely serious and depressing "end of the world" type stuff. I have to consciously make a decision every day what thoughts I am going to allow myself to focus on, and what I am going to put my energy towards.
My husband has been driving me crazy. He has many amazing qualities, most of which any woman would kill to be able to enjoy. I, on the other hand, am in my crazy hormonal "you make everything suck" stage. I've been focusing on ALL of his negatives instead of ALL of his positives! Yesterday, I was just to the edge of feeling sorry for myself, my- perfect, hard working, money earning, house cleaning, makeup wearing, diaper changing, bill paying, "miss do it all by herself"- self. I was getting the short end of the stick in EVERYTHING and Eric was causing more harm than good. So, I decided to dig up a book to read. In my search, I found a book I had never read before that had been lying around for years. "the Love Dare". I took it out and immediately the first chapter hit me hard.
"...Impatient people are some of the hardest to live with." was a line that really sunk in. I have always known I am an impatient person. I've never looked at it as a horrible quality, but in this book, it explained how impatient spouses are quick to react. Quick to be angry and hurt and to say hurtful things. Here I was for the past month thinking I was the poor one who was treated unfairly and had done nothing wrong. I felt so guilty when I realized that person is me. I'M the one who's hard to live with. I'M the one quick to anger, and not so quick with forgiving. This first day's challenge was to say nothing negative to my partner, and WOW! We got along great even through today. I noticed a huge change when I changed MY attitude and MY perspective.
I'm thankful for this change of heart, and for the revelation this book has already brought me. I will continue to read it and hope that it helps me change into a better spouse, mother, and friend. In the meantime, I'm choosing to focus my crazy nonstop energy into positive outlets. If you struggle with anxiety or depression or negative thoughts, here are some things that I practice daily that put my mind and well-being in a better place:
1. coffee in the morning
2. exercise- yoga I find is the most calming and mind-centering
3. reading the bible (new development) just a couple chapters a day
4. lighting a candle
5. deep breathing
6. taking a long walk while listening to calming music that makes your heart happy
7. cooking an easy meal that I know the boys will like
8. cleaning! so therapeutic, and I find it allows you to think clearly
9. limited tv time. I find tv to be an extremely depressing thing if overused
10. being outside somewhere peaceful and pretty
11. driving to a different city and doing something unusual for yourself
12. playing a fun game. (I like chess)
Maybe try some of these things if you want! Oh, and if you're in the same boat as me, I already encourage the "Love Dare" book to you and your spouse. I guess your problems in life really have to do with yourself, and not so much with the world and others around you.
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